Tuesday, August 26, 2008

How To Distract Boys Who Are Worried Their Kitten Will Die

During tonight's shower & get ready for bed extravaganza, the toilet was filled and not flushed and our kitten, an adventurous sort, leaped up to investigate. She slipped on some drips on the seat, though, and fell in. SPLASH! She immediately leaped out and began to lick her leg. EEEEEWWW! KIPPAH'S DRINKING PEE-PEE!

Chris, being of sound (if angry & frustrated) mind, picked the dripping kitten up and deposited her in our shower, where she could be enclosed for a nice wash. The children finally got their wits about them and fled to their beds, tearful that the kitten might be about to die. SHE DRANK PEE.

I washed the kitten. Then, as Chris hadn't been successful at calming the boys, I went in...with this:

"Drinking pee-pee is gross. It is disgusting and you should NOT do it, BUT...it will not kill you. In fact, if you are stranded on a sailboat on the ocean, you should drink your own pee-pee, you should not drink the salty ocean. If you are stranded in a sailboat on Lake Erie, though, drink Lake Erie - it's marginally better than your own pee. IF YOU ARE NOT STRANDED ON THE OCEAN IN A SAILBOAT, do not drink your own pee. Even though it won't kill you."

Lars tried to interject with a question, but I cut him off, "NO QUESTIONS. GO TO SLEEP."

Both boys seem to have forgotten their worry that the kitten might die.

cross posted at reason enough...


LMP said...

I can't give you a point for this because that's just sound advice right there. Now those kids are ready for Dune and Dr. Strangelove. (We must preserve our precious bodily fluids!)

Cornelius Crew said...

Just have come across your blog for the first time, and being the mother of 2 boys and a little girl... I have greatly related to your stories and love the humorous stories. If you're going to be a good parent, sometimes you've got to see the humor in things! Love your site!