Friday, September 7, 2007

Decisions, Decisions

Something I've learned during my adventure in gestating is "it's all about choices." Having been admonished by my fellow contributors to this blog that WMPs are awarded for "knowing acts" and since my bid for WME is limited right now to choices that affect a child in utero, I offer up the story of Thursday. I like to think of it as Zero Nutrition Thursday, and it goes something like this: for breakfast, an enormous and highly caloric, fat- and sugar-laden Starbucks blueberry muffin washed down not by nutritious milk, but a venti iced passion tea shaken with three Splenda. For lunch, a sodium-bomb Arby's roast beef sandwich topped Arby's sauce and washed down with a MEDIUM Diet Pepsi. Lunch context: inhaled in my car, SPEEDING to a meeting, because I left my office really, really late, after spending too much time building a baby registry. For dinner, I was craving Raging Burrito. Alas we have no Raging Burrito in Florida, so I settled for a Triple Lindy from Moe's. It WAS made of black beans and tofu, but wrapped in a flour tortilla made with lard and also washed down with a MEDIUM Diet Pepsi. Did I drink any milk? No. Did I eat any vegetables? Not really, unless you count the sweetened blueberries in my muffin and the salsa in my burritos. Did I enjoy any whole grains, whole fruits or 64 oz. of water? No, no and no. Do I feel guilty about any of it? NO! After all, I DID swallow my once-daily Expecta pill and prenatal vitamin.

4 comments:

Farrago_NW said...

Oh, what a shame! That Expecta pill and vitamin tablet probably prevented you from spawning the next Nicole Ritchie. BTW, shouldn't Nicole Ritchie be invited to post here? Or do you not allow ringers?

Hey BTW2, I had a GREAT idea: what if all you terrible mommies had an annual convention where you paint numbers on the filthy backs of your malnourished nippers and RACE them? You could smoke cigars and bet real money ... put butter on their knees to make them faster. Winner gets a case of Pediägermeister.

karen said...

@farrago: Annual? We do that weekly. Come by! Bets are cash only and payouts may or may not reflect the apparent winner.

Paige, your score is:

1 WMP for sugary, fatty, iced-teay breakfast

1 WMP for sodium-bomb lunch

-1 WMP for the tofu, even if it was in a lard-wrapped burrito.

1 WMP for surviving the drive-by.

Total score: 2 WMP! Happy gestating...

P.S. I think I will begin participating in ZNT (Zero Nutrition Thursdays) - yum.

thirtysomething said...

Zero-nutrition thursdays sounds like a hit to me! Hey, at least it was after all a DIET Pepsi, I believe we must give credit where credit is due and subtract a point there...

Epiphany Alone said...

No way, Thirtysomething. Splenda and artificial sweeteners are a big NO NO. I agree with Karen's 2 WMP, but I would've awarded one each for the diet Pepsi...