Tuesday, January 15, 2008

New Member Intro......It's Too Hard to Live at My House


Hello everyone! I just stumbled upon this wonderful blog (er...sarcasm mill?), and I LOVE it!

I was asked to write in an intro about myself. Well, how much time do we have? I tend to be long winded, so I'll attempt to keep this short. I have been married over 15 years and have five children. Three biological sons ages 12, 11, & 9, two adopted daughters ages 4 & 2. I enjoy crafts, adoption and parenting books, websites, education, cooking, cycling, our church, friends, and a good laugh. I'm currently on a mission to lose the last 40 pounds of about 100 pounds that were too many. Privacy is important to me, so I post under an anonymous name. I won't be posting pics of my family, but I will post humorous photos I come across.

After my husband and I were both raised in entirely dysfunctional homes with none of our parents being any sort of mentor/role model, we decided to blindly jump into the world of marriage and parenting. We got engaged after three dates, married 6 months later. What fun! We survived the first few years of marriage. We are still alive after my one time only "batter fried fish" entree for dinner that nearly killed us both. And a five alarm dish of enchiladas.

We always wanted a large family, the term "large" still being debated. When I was in high school, a desire for adoption began to run thick thru my blood and deep in my heart. When my husband asked me to marry him, I asked him about a day later if we could adopt. He said basically, "well, since we haven't had sex, we don't even know if we have infertility issues. So, back to that sex topic, can we discuss that?.............." He has two adopted siblings and has always been open to adoption. He grew up seeing the positives, heartache, issues, joys, and the recipe of an adoptive family.

Moving along, we had three bio boys in three years. The third pregnancy left me on bed rest for seven months, followed by a birth that left me with a surprise hysterectomy and menopause. My first thought? Now we can adopt!!! My husband was rolling his eyes since we had three very young boys, our third being born deaf (has since been repaired). To make life even more interesting, our 12yr old son has ODD (oppositional defiant disorder), and our 9yr old son has Aspergers. Since we needed more drama around here than that, we decided to adopt a little girl from Russia.

To make a really long adoption story short, we went all the way to Far East Russia to adopt a precious little 3yr old girl. We were never able to bring her home due to our adoption agency operating illegally. We have since sued them and the FBI is prosecuting them. We regrouped, found a new adoption agency, and adopted two girls practically out of our backyard in our home state. The girls are in our home on an adoption placement, adoption soon to be finalized in a couple months.

Living in my home is a new adventure every day. To sum it up, our 4yr old daughter says "It's just too hard to live here. I have to make my bed, clean my room, get dressed, and I have to tell the truth, and I have to keep my undies dry." She states this matter of fact at least once a week. Our clean cut, healthy, positive, nurturing home is so foreign to her that it really is work for her to be a family member. So apparently it's just too hard to live here, huh? One time she beat up her younger sister here. My husband walked in on them and yelled at the 4yr old as he picked her up off her 2yr old sister. She immediately said "Time for us (the girls) to move!" She was ready to pack her bags and be gone. We explained that everyone makes mistakes, and you don't move just because you make a mistake.

For my WorstMamaEver story to add this time........
Yesterday we weren't going anywhere. I let my 2yr old wear a wool plaid jumper dress, black turtle neck, leopard print pants, hot pink socks, black church mary janes, and a big smile. My husband thought she looked like a Lady of the Evening, but ya know what? I thought she looked so happy that I didn't care what she was wearing. Heck, we are in our own home for heavens sake. Of course I would make sure she looks normal heading out to the grocery store, church, whatnot.

I have a personal blog called SpecialNeedsKids (clickable) if any of you would like to read more of my adventures. Please let me know if you are aware of any kids special needs blogs that may be of interest.

I look forward to getting to know you all, laughing with you at the highlights and lowlights of your day, and encouraging each other. Best wishes everyone!

8 comments:

*pab said...

Welcome!

emmay said...

Indeed, welcome! With quite a house full of kids, you should have,lots of stories for us.

karen said...

A hearty heigh-ho! My husband and I sometimes joke about how on earth "they" ever let us be parents - seems like something someone should have to get a license for, you know? Wait...if you're fostering, you've GOT a license. I thought this blog was for amateurs? Clearly, we're all going to have to step it up.

I'm willing to award +1 WMP for your harlot toddler. Next time you let her dress herself, be sure to have some Pirate Booty for snack, so she might utter one of Ross' best ever lines (delivered at pre-school, very loudly), "MORE BOOTY PLEASE!"

Kicking N. Screaming said...

Welcome! So delightful to have you, but...what's wrong with letting your kid look ridiculous in public? I'm so confused...

The Roaming Southerner said...

Great post!

Chaotic Joy said...

Welcome to the WMEs. I always said that I am the worst mama because I have the most kids to mother badly. Looks like I am going to have some competition.

Spice Girl said...

Hey! Welcome! My son has Asperger's too, so I can relate.

Grandmoo said...

Dysfunctional family, lots a collected kids...you should fit in just fine! (My aunt had 54 foster kids, 9 of whom they adopted; my parents (Karen's grandparents)had four and then collected five more (including two-year-old twin boys and an OCD brother) within a few months of my own brother's third birthday. I like to think my fine dysfunctional childhood helped me become a rotten mama, which resulted in Karen reigning supreme during many WME months!)Welcome!