Friday, January 18, 2008

Worst. Day. Ever

Well, if it wasn't the worst, it was close. I've been sick all week AGAIN, Helen has been sick. Ruthie hasn't been sick, but I'd be very surprised if she wasn't getting sick, based on her horrific behavior today. I won't bore you with the minutiae of my day I'll just recount some of the more fun moments.
Ruthie decided, five minutes before we needed to leave for th gym (yeah, why was I going to the gym when I'm sick...mostly because the thought of spending ALL DAY in the house with my children was too much to bear.) that she needed to change into pair of ugly pants that did not match her shirt. They are pants I don;t like for anything but hanging around the house. But I didn't have the energy to wrangle her into the ones I picked out because I was too busy telling her how hideous her outfit was. At the risk of losing any points I may have been awarded for that, I felt awful and apologized to her later, telling her how beautiful she looked today. Thank God she believed me.
Helen fell off the kitchen chair as I was loading the car for the gym. I had so had it with theatrics and crying at that point that I merely picked her up off her back, where she was laying in a pile of Cheerios and Raisin Bran, placed her in a chair without saying anything and walked away from my crying toddler, and out the door. Fortunately, I realized later she was not hurt.
After the gym, we went to Target to pick up a few things. I let Helen walk into the store. Usually she is in a cart. The plan was to find a cart they could both sit in. I don't know if she fell or threw herself on the floor, but there she was, laying on the floor in the middle of the entrance, screaming, while the automatic door kept opening and closing. She flung herself onto her back and I left her there, to get a cart, while Ruthie screamed, "Mommy, look where she is, she's on the floor," and other patrons stepped over her to get in. I got many a dirty look from the elderly couples shuffling in, but the cart guy thought it was hilarious.
After we got home from Target, I realized what a bad idea it was to have gone to the gym, as I ha d used up nearly every ounce of energy on the x-bike. This left me no choice but to force Ruthie to take a nap. This was made much easier by the temper tantrum she threw just after lunch. I carried her to her room to let her scream. She emerged into the hallway. I put her back and locked her in. When she realized she was locked in, she worked herself into a total frenzy that eventually led to a nice 2 hour nap. But sleep did not come before I made my way in to her room and informed her that children in my house didn't act this way, and if she wanted to throw fits of this nature she could pack her bags and move in with another family. Since she's not quite four, she can't reach her suitcase at the top of the closet, so she shut up and settled down.


Ashley Long said...

+1 for allowing your child to lay in the middle of the Target entrance throwing a tantrum and forcing the other patrons to step over her...awesome!

Kids Special Needs said...

I'm awarding a point to you. Hilarious accounting of your day!!

I'm surprised you had the energy at all to blog (another reason I'm awarding this point).

So, how have you recovered? Alcohol? Sleep? Cut your head off?

Chaotic Joy said...

I actually laughed out loud at the vision of the doors opening and shutting on your daughter while people stepped over her. This is so funny, I think you should get two points just for the multitudes of people who must have thought awful things about your parenting skills and for suggesting to your four year old that she move out.

You rock.

karen said...

If I'd had to step over your storming kid on my way in to Target, I totally would have invited you to write for this blog!

I'm seconding (thirding? fifthing?) the point you've been awarded here and offering a friendly bit of advice: throw out those pants you hate. :)

Spice Girl said...

We're all in agreement. I'll give you two points: 1 for the opening and closing doors, and 1 for the suitcase in the closet.

As for the pants, have you ever read _Ella Sarah Gets Dressed_ by Margaret Chodros-Irvine? She was at my writers residency this week and is a delightful person.