Wednesday, August 22, 2007

De-Fault, the two sweetest words in the English language!

Yesterday Kate didn't want to go to daycare. This is not unusual. The announcement that it's time to go usually provokes protests - "No! No daycare! We're hangin' out here today!" Yesterday, reportedly, was no different. After the usual battle Jeremiah got both girls in the car, in their carseats, belts buckled, cheeks kissed. Just as he was climbing into the driver's seat Kate said "I have to go to the potty!" Jeremiah was dubious. "Do you really have to go to the potty or are you just stalling?" (We tell Kate she must be Russin because she's so often stallin' or pootin') Big doe eyes blinked back at him and nodded, "I have to go to the potty!" Jeremiah gave her a very grim look and said "if you're lying and you don't really need to use the potty when we get in there, you will not be allowed to watch any DVDs tonight when you get home." She assured him she had to use the potty. So everyone was removed from the carseats and toted back inside, causing Jeremiah to be late.

Kate did not have to use the potty.

I was informed, since I'd be picking the little darlings up, that Kate was not to be permitted a moment's time with the television. "I've got your back" I stated seriously, steeling myself for blows in the evening.

Then it came. I picked them up and home we went. It was at least 15 minutes before Kate requested Nemo. I was impressed. "Kate, don't you remember this morning daddy told you there'd be no TV tonight?" Scowling and then "I want to watch Nemo please." I stood my ground, shook my head. Arms akimbo, she stomped her foot as hard as she could manage and declared for the very first time "You're MEAN!"

My heart was aflutter as I thought instantly of the WME point I sound roundly deserve. "I'm mean?!?" I said with mock horror "would you say I'm the worst mama ever?"
"Yes!" she replied to my abject delight "you are and you're MEAN!" I couldn't believe it, it wasn't even my punishment! She retreated to her play kitchen and began to grill all the unfortunate toys and dolls in sight. When she ran out of toys to grill, she stuck her own head fully on the grill, pulled the cover down as far as she could get it and hit the little "ignite" button that makes all the gas-grill-turning-on sounds. I thought, admittedly with pride, that was a bit dramatic.

6 comments:

Joy, of course said...

Ha Ha Ha HA Ha HA Ha!!!!!!
Hillarious.

Farrago_NW said...

Leave it to Lisa; she could find gray area in the rules to Battleship.

Question: is there video of this supposed exchange?

The Plaid Sheep said...

I cannot improve on Joy's comment. That girl really has a nice flair for the dramatic.

sister k said...

sometimes i too, feel like grilling my head!

karen said...

Leading! No points for leading the witness! Besides, we've already determined that "mean" and "worst" are not the same thing at all.

Still, I'll give you a WMP for the head-grilling. Kate has a very creative way of demonstrating her fury!

Epiphany Alone said...

Hey...she gets a point for her kid grilling her own head?! Shouldn't Kate get a WCP (Worst Child Point) for that?