Friday, August 31, 2007

My bid

I really hit some high notes this week in my bid for Worst Mama. Lauren had soccer camp this week while Lindsay tried to normalize her naps. Adjusted now from the trip to the West Coast, she could no longer be convinced that 11 AM was a good time for a nap, and insisted on singing for an hour, and then going to sleep. It was a struggle to wake her up at 1:15 so that we could drive a half hour to pick up Lauren. Also, she wasn't really thrilled to be roused out of bed at 8 AM. So I fed poor Lindsay a breakfast and 3 lunches this week in the car, ladies. Breakfast was merely half of a Nature's Promise blueberry waffle, but lunch was a neufchatel (light cream cheese) and apricot All Fruit on whole wheat with halved grapes and strawberries.

I picked Lauren up from camp yesterday, and she said, as she always does when I arrive, that she has to potty. So I told her to find the coach who was bringing the kids inside the school (the camp is on the field outside). The coaches were busy, so she asked one of the older campers. As they were walking to the school, I noticed a suspicious brown stain on her butt. At that moment, the woman standing next to me said, "Do you think someone else besides my 10-year-old daughter can handle this?"

I didn't reply, I thanked the little girl and took Lauren's hand and told her I had to go also.

When we got into the bathroom, I demanded she remove her shorts. "Why?"

"Because it looks like you had an accident."

"No I didn't," she replied indignantly. "I was just sitting in the sand."

And, she was right. I brushed off what I could and then asked her to put them back on. As she was struggling to take off her shin guards and put back on her shorts, she was chatting up a storm about this and that. A couple of 8-year-old girls came in to wash their hands. Lauren prattled on. At this moment, I lost my patience, "Lauren, can you put your clothes back on already so we can go?!"

"Working on it, Mom."

As the girls left the bathroom, I heard the peals of laughter and my face grew hot. Oh my gosh, I just humiliated my own child in front of older girls.

Really. I'm just that horrible.

1 comment:

Joy, of course said...

Oh. This is one of those crawl under a rock moments isn't it. I am quite familiar with those. I award you 2 points. 1 for trying to pawn your poopy daughter off on a ten year old and another for humilating her in the girls room.

No points for lunch in the car though. Especially not such a healthy lunch. Don't you remember how hard I had to fight to get a point for feeding Ben Cheetos for lunch three days in a row.