Thursday, August 30, 2007

Living in Squalor

I think this might actually be my worst bit of parenting to date. I would expect this from a mama who has a little bit of a meth problem, but I, being on a very tight budget these days, am completely drug-free. About 2 days ago Jeremiah asked me if I recalled putting Kate in her overnight pull-up the previous night. "You put her to bed last night." I responded "I assumed you did." He struck a pensive pose. "Yeah, it seems like I would've been the one to do that but I really can't remember and this morning when I went up to get her she was already on the potty and she had underwear around her ankles." We just looked at each other for a moment. "Did they feel wet? Was her bed wet?" I asked. He answered in the negative for both. We assumed she'd gone all night pee-free and allowed ourselves to feel somewhat heartened by this little gaff. An exciting step in the slow journey of potty training! I wasn't about to take that chance again, though. I thought that to myself and then promptly forgot the whole thing.

That night Kate was very late in getting to bed. There had been the stalling, the crying, the 4 fruitless trips to the potty and finally we'd reached the bedding down portion of the show. Such a sweet little girl...I admired her sleepy face as I pulled the sheet up to her chin and leaned down to give her a kiss goodnight. As I did so, I was met with a most foul stench. I change the sheets weekly...usually...don't I? I said "Kate, is your bed wet?" having no idea why her bed would be wet. She shook her head no and yawned. I glanced at the clock, considering making her get back up while I changed the sheets. They really smelled. But it was already 8:00 and I was starving. She seemed so comfy...I'll change them tomorrow, I told myself. I stretched over the side of Sarah's crib and gave the snoozing cherub a peck on the head and left the room.

Wait. It gets worse. As I frequently don't see the girls in the morning before dashing out the door, I did not do any changing of bedsheets before work the next day. Then Jeremiah put the girls to bed that night, while I was making dinner. I failed to make mention of the sheet issue. In fact, I'd forgotten again. Life moves fast, what can I say?

Finally, day 3, it's my morning to take the girls to daycare. I was rousing everyone from their pleasant sleep and rushing them out the door. When I completed my always successful play, the Tickle, Nuzzle, Lift as I call it, on Kate, I was reminded that I am a horrible mother. I picked up the giggly, groggy 3-year-old from her bed and there, plain as yellow snow, was a giant, aged pee-stain. Ugh. I did finally strip the bed at that point but I remain disgusted with myself for letting my kid sleep in her own filth. For 3 straight days. And frankly, I'm a little surprised Jeremiah never noticed. But this isn't about him. I took a whiff of her and she did, despite having bathed before bed, smell faintly of urine...but I was running late and I sent her to daycare like that. Feeling like a dismal failure of a parent I managed to cheer myself only slightly when I thought "maybe this is worth a WME point..."


Farrago_NW said...

I'm concerned somebody might not *get* this. I mean, actually think this is a true story.

Joy, of course said...

Oh stop. Thats not what I meant. I meant that they might think we were actually trying to do things wrong to earn points.

Sorry if I was offensive.

Oh and Yes dear. One wmp for your slovenly behavior. Although the guilt you feel about it diminishes it some.

Farrago_NW said...

Jeeeesss joshing, of course!

It's Kate's bedsheets that are offensive(and heaven knows what else around that house).

karen said...

I'm not sure if this one gets a point or not. If you only smell something funny and it causes you to suspect - but not so much as to really investigate the matter and prolong your getting to dinner - then perhaps you're not the Worst Mama. WME is when you KNOW the sheets are wet and you toss the little bugger in there anyway...

Brooklyn Volunteer said...

That is a truly horrible story. I'm in shock. I'll just keep the images of the birthday tea cup cupcakes in my head.