Thursday, August 30, 2007

Living in Squalor

I think this might actually be my worst bit of parenting to date. I would expect this from a mama who has a little bit of a meth problem, but I, being on a very tight budget these days, am completely drug-free. About 2 days ago Jeremiah asked me if I recalled putting Kate in her overnight pull-up the previous night. "You put her to bed last night." I responded "I assumed you did." He struck a pensive pose. "Yeah, it seems like I would've been the one to do that but I really can't remember and this morning when I went up to get her she was already on the potty and she had underwear around her ankles." We just looked at each other for a moment. "Did they feel wet? Was her bed wet?" I asked. He answered in the negative for both. We assumed she'd gone all night pee-free and allowed ourselves to feel somewhat heartened by this little gaff. An exciting step in the slow journey of potty training! I wasn't about to take that chance again, though. I thought that to myself and then promptly forgot the whole thing.

That night Kate was very late in getting to bed. There had been the stalling, the crying, the 4 fruitless trips to the potty and finally we'd reached the bedding down portion of the show. Such a sweet little girl...I admired her sleepy face as I pulled the sheet up to her chin and leaned down to give her a kiss goodnight. As I did so, I was met with a most foul stench. I change the sheets weekly...usually...don't I? I said "Kate, is your bed wet?" having no idea why her bed would be wet. She shook her head no and yawned. I glanced at the clock, considering making her get back up while I changed the sheets. They really smelled. But it was already 8:00 and I was starving. She seemed so comfy...I'll change them tomorrow, I told myself. I stretched over the side of Sarah's crib and gave the snoozing cherub a peck on the head and left the room.

Wait. It gets worse. As I frequently don't see the girls in the morning before dashing out the door, I did not do any changing of bedsheets before work the next day. Then Jeremiah put the girls to bed that night, while I was making dinner. I failed to make mention of the sheet issue. In fact, I'd forgotten again. Life moves fast, what can I say?

Finally, day 3, it's my morning to take the girls to daycare. I was rousing everyone from their pleasant sleep and rushing them out the door. When I completed my always successful play, the Tickle, Nuzzle, Lift as I call it, on Kate, I was reminded that I am a horrible mother. I picked up the giggly, groggy 3-year-old from her bed and there, plain as yellow snow, was a giant, aged pee-stain. Ugh. I did finally strip the bed at that point but I remain disgusted with myself for letting my kid sleep in her own filth. For 3 straight days. And frankly, I'm a little surprised Jeremiah never noticed. But this isn't about him. I took a whiff of her and she did, despite having bathed before bed, smell faintly of urine...but I was running late and I sent her to daycare like that. Feeling like a dismal failure of a parent I managed to cheer myself only slightly when I thought "maybe this is worth a WME point..."

5 comments:

FlapScrap said...

I'm concerned somebody might not *get* this. I mean, actually think this is a true story.

Chaotic Joy said...

Oh stop. Thats not what I meant. I meant that they might think we were actually trying to do things wrong to earn points.

Sorry if I was offensive.

Oh and Yes dear. One wmp for your slovenly behavior. Although the guilt you feel about it diminishes it some.

FlapScrap said...

Jeeeesss joshing, of course!

It's Kate's bedsheets that are offensive(and heaven knows what else around that house).

karen said...

I'm not sure if this one gets a point or not. If you only smell something funny and it causes you to suspect - but not so much as to really investigate the matter and prolong your getting to dinner - then perhaps you're not the Worst Mama. WME is when you KNOW the sheets are wet and you toss the little bugger in there anyway...

Brooklyn Volunteer said...

That is a truly horrible story. I'm in shock. I'll just keep the images of the birthday tea cup cupcakes in my head.