Monday, October 29, 2007

Just like summer re-runs

So, I tell ya, for the second time I went out without diapers in the diaper bag, and Lindsay peed on someone else kitchen floor, except that unlike the situation at Karen's house of being just the three of us, it was in a room full of people and I was pretending she was wearing a diaper under her well-soaked navy yoga pants. Oh, and my friend wasn't in on the pee joke. Happy birthday! Oh, don't tell me they don't pee in your kitchen to wish you a good year where you're from...

I told my story about the neighbor who asks me every day where Lindsay is when I show up at the bus stop unattended to dismayed stares from friends and neighbors. "You know that's illegal, right?" "It's a pretty stupid law." "It's still illegal."

Yes. I am breaking the law.

My child has now urinated on two friends kitchen floors.

You're really gearing up to invite me over to your next dinner party, aren't you?

Or better yet, dinner party Chez Stoll, leave those diapers behind!


karen said...

1 WMP for letting your kid fertilize yet another kitchen floor!

Kitchen-floor-pooping kid and all, you're welcome here anytime (but you know that). We've even got diapers now, although they're not in the freezer like your Grandmother's company cigarettes.

Wait - it's illegal to let your baby sleep in the house while you go to the corner? Is that just a your-town thing? At what age does it become legal for a child to be unattended at home?

Epiphany Alone said...

It is regulated by the state. I believe it's age 8, and you're allowed x number of minutes during the day.

I just don't really understand why so many people are appalled. If I dragged Lin out of bed, she'd be in a terrible mood the rest of the afternoon.

Chaotic Joy said...

I had a really great WME story that I never found time to write (I have fallen into a blogging abyss) that involved Bem pooping in the grocery cart at Target last month. Oh yes it's true.

I think you should get a point for leaving your child in mortal danger each day while you go to the bustop AND one for forgetting diapers AGAIN. I mean really, I let you slide the first time. :)

OOPS...I accidentally posted this comment on the post below. Where id didn't apply at all.

The Plaid Sheep said...

Well, it's obvious isn't it? In the fifteen minutes that you're gone she's going to climb out of her crib, roll down the stairs then manage to turn the oven on and drink all the cleaning fluids in the house.
My aunt tells me that in New York City in the 50's people used to park the baby carriage outside the store while they went shopping. We've come a long way baby.

Ashley Long said...

Before Todd was in daycare (I brought him with me to work until he was 16mos.), I would leave him in the car when I would pick up Kyle from daycare. One day, I had a VERY CONCERNED PARENT and FRANTIC DAY CARE WORKER flitting around my car when I walked back with Kyle. Apparently Todd was crying (which he was he doing before I even left the car) and the VCP could hear him and went to get the FDCW. Seriously, we are talking 5 mins tops I am gone from the car, in a parking spot right next to the main door. I got some serious dirty looks and snarky comments for leaving my 6mo old in the car. However, my world was right as Kyle was happy I could carry him, I did not have to wrestle with an infant car seat and get a two year old in his seat at the same time and Todd stopped crying as soon as I unlocked the door. So there!