Tuesday, July 31, 2007

In the Race

Ok, so I'm losing dismally, but that's only because I haven't spent enough time in blog-land to accumulate the points. So here goes.

1. I must get some points for going back to school--so utterly selfish. I mean, really, there is no purpose behind this MFA. I leave my children for 11 days straight twice a year, and ignore them when I'm home (so I can read children's literature. But not to them, mind you.)

2. The other day both my boys had nose bleeds. Now, I know the scenario would be better if I GAVE them the nosebleeds, but let's not be too ambitious here. We were driving to pick up the Gingerbread Man and when we got there, I got out of the car, talked to GBM for a bit, then saw Will's face when I got back in the car and there was blood smeared all over it. Nice. I hadn't even noticed through the entire drive. He's got a gusher and I'm crooning along to radio tunes. Later, just so he wouldn't be left out, Samuel had one too. Then he had another one. Then Will started crying so hard (probably because I yelled--another point?) that he started bleeding again too. I take no points or credits for Samuel's bleed. But maybe Will's sadly neglected state?

3. This next one might not qualify me for points either, but I spent the entire day reading Harry Potter. Will kept asking me very sweetly to come play with him.
Me: "In just a minute, sweetie." Then twenty minutes would go by.
Will: "Mommy, come play with me."
Me: "How about if you set up the train tracks and when you're all done, I'll zoom the train?"
ALL DAY LONG.

4. Samuel asked to go for a walk two days ago. It's hot. Ok, let's go for a walk. We get two houses away and Samuel says, "It's too hot. My legs won't work. I want to go home."
Me: "No. You wanted to go for a walk, so we're going for a walk." Samuel immediately put up such a fuss that the entire neighborhood was probably recording it for Halloween music. Screams, etc. And Will and I left Samuel by the side of the road. He eventually followed, caterwauling all the way. When he tried to throw his stuffed lion at me, I let him have it and I warned him that if I heard another peep from him, he would be sent to bed when we got home. Well, when we got home, I sent him to bed.

I could continue and continue and continue, but I won't. Am I still in the race???

3 comments:

Joy, of course said...

Okay, lets see. I definately say you should get a point for leaving your kids for 11 days straight just for the fun of it (I mean since writing and hanging with writers IS your idea of fun after all).

I'll give you a half a point each for Harry Potter and the Nose Bleed and 2 points for leaving your 3 year old crying on the side of the road.

So that's like 4 points by my book...what's everyone else say.

Oh and I am FINALLY almost done with Harry too. I made the mistake of trying to re-read the previous book which I just couldn't muster up much enthusiasm for, but since I have been on book 7, I've been plowing through it. Poor Harry is really having a hard time.

Spice Girl said...

Just for the record, it wasn't my three-year old I left at the side of the road, exhibiting such horrendous behavior; it was my SIX-year old. Thanks for the points Joy! I knew you'd understand! :)

karen said...

I also vote this is a 4-pointer:

+1 for partying hearty in "school"

+1 for letting your kids bleed out while you entertain karaoke dreams

+1 for ignoring Will so you could read HP

I can't give a point for continuing the walk - I think that was actually a good parent thing...teaching consequences and follow-through and all that. The Worst Mother (I) would have done a 180 right away (cheering in my head) and taken everyone home to ignore while I finished reading HP.

I will, however, give +1 for abandonment - even though the kid was able to find his way home in time for bed.