Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Why I qualify to be a Worst Mama Ever

1. I allowed my husband and his friends to coach my firstborn in saying "boobies" on command. I might have even giggled at the performance.

2. My youngest has eaten dog poop. (I know...ewww...I'm still traumatized)

3. My children watch entirely too much tv because I spend entirely too much time online.

4. I have been known to strap my two-year-old in her high chair with candy to keep her quiet so that I can take an uninterrupted shower.

5. I let my oldest avoid cleaning his room until we almost had to shovel a path to his bed.

6. There are grody crumbs under the high chair padding that have been there for...well...too long.

Hi, I'm Jen from Surviving Life, and I'm the newest WME. I'm mom to Matthew (8), Lauren (2), and Oliver (9 months), and I've been a Worst Mama since my oldest first yelled "I hate you!" and slammed his bedroom door - I believe he was two at the time.

I'm a full time college student right now...just over a year from now I'll be officially licensed to mold young minds, which is a pretty scary thought. For now, I stay home with the two little ones during the day, try to keep the house clean(ish), and spend massive amounts of time online goofing off when I should be studying. I also work as an online tutor in the evenings, whenever I can stay awake past 9pm.

I tend to blog sporadically, but I think I have enough Worst Mama moments that you'll see me around here fairly frequently.

Finally, because I can't resist, here are my kids:

Lauren, who is two, never stops moving, and usually makes faces at the camera.

Matthew, 8, the morning after staying up late and overloading on sugar for Halloween.

Oliver, my youngest, eating leaves. Yes, I ran for the camera before I fished the leaves out of his mouth.


Chaotic Joy said...

Hi! Welcome aboard. I have four kids and was the reigning worst mama back when we started this thing. Now I'm pretty much the absentee Worst Mama, which is not to say I am not parenting poorly. I just don't seem to have time to write about it.

Fraukow said...

Dog poop wins, hands down! Crown the new Queen!

LMP said...

Welcome! I can't wait to read about your parenting gaffs in an effort to make myself feel somewhat better about my own. Oh, who am I kidding? I don't feel that bad about my own, what doesn't destroy my kids makes me stronger! Or...something like that. Anyway, it's wonderful to have you here and your progeny, who will one day contribute to a group blog called "My Mama Was Much Worst Than Yours" with the rest of our wee ones featured here, are adorable.

Jen Goble said...

Thanks for the welcome! I'll post the complete dog poop story sometime when I'm feeling brave.