Sunday, November 4, 2007

Tales From the Bathroom

This story is from a few weeks ago, before I joined WME. I hope it's okay to resurrect stories. After all, I do need to prove I belong here, right?
My older daughter is capable of doing nearly everything for herself when it comes to the bathroom. She does have difficulty unsnapping her pants, so it was nothing unusual this morning when she asked me to unsnap them for her. I did this, and then returned to whatever was demanding my attention (the computer). Her shouts that the baby was in the bathroom were met with my direction to take her sister by the hand and lead her out. She knows how to do this. Today, she didn’t do it. After a few long minutes of delightful but disconcerting silence, (I knew I should have checked on things right away, but I couldn't...I just couldn't), I made my way over to the bathroom. Having not seen the baby on my way there, I wasn’t surprised when I opened the door and caught sight of her pigtails and overalls. I was, however, horrified to find her elbow deep in a toilet that had been used by my older daughter, but not flushed. Yay! Water play isn’t enough fun…let’s have urine play. I handled this with far less grace and patience than I should have. A few expletives probably passed my lips and I dragged the baby out of the bathroom and stripped her, washed her down with some baby wipes and a wash cloth, and declared her clean. She got an additional, full blown scrub down later, but I made her father do it.

2 comments:

Lady Epiphany said...

Oh, awesome. Seriously. I love it.

Sorry to disappoint you, but you don't have to prove you belong here. You are in the sisterhood of Worst Mamas.

Your little one seems to think urine is a cleaning solvent, and while I know it's sterile, it is one of those things that would totally ick me out.

You don't get points for benign neglect. I mean, how the heck are they going to learn to entertain themselves if we pay attention to them every single minute?

You get 1 WMP for urine play. You wouldn't ordinarily, but we consistently award a point for a repeated infraction.

Lack of grace and patience are on par for a Worst Mama. No points for that.

Although I really want to award a point for not putting the baby in the bath right away, the purpose of a baby wipe is to clean urine, right? If she played with her sister's feces and you cleaned it with a wipe...

Ok, ew. I've icked myself out.

Anonymous said...

between urine and beer, you guys might be WME but you're definitely funny! besides, urine's sterile, right? :)